The world was getting really small
So I imagined you were with me.
The hole in my chest was growing
So I picture you holding me.
The storms are coming again
So I thought of us building a fort.
The colors are turning grey
So you gave me a red rose.
I thought of many things,
But at the end of the day
What matters most
Isn’t what I could see us doing
But rather the comfort
Though still in your absence
That I can find
just because I knew you.
This summer, I failed at everything I set out to do, and I’m uncertain of what’s to come. I still know that I will remember my time in NY as well spent months because I met you. I’ve realized I’m still too dependent on my parents and relatives to form relationships like this, and that it’s unfair to you to be with you.
I tried to rebel against my class standing by working hard, by applying to many places, by doing the things “they” say to do, and the reality is that I have no power. There is nothing I can do; the American dream is for people in their 30’s. The youth are dead. Condemned to drink, smoke, and wallow in entertainment and pop culture. I tried to escape and I failed. I will wear these chains of my youth until after grad school. I just hope I’m able to preserve the enthusiasm for experience and life I currently possess.